Friday, January 4, 2013

Weird Key Words of December 2012

It's that time once again, hipsters, to take a look at some of the more bizarre search terms that have lead people to my little blog.  These all came from the month of December, and they are...rather inexplicable.

  • How do you kiss James Aldrich?  (Start off with buying him a drink.)
  • Ouija boards in Avon Lake, Ohio Walmart
  • Sleeps in the buff
  • 8 maids-a-milking nude (Someone's in the XXXmas spirit)
  • Defiler of daughters
  • Logo of American Society of Master Dental Proctologists (Don't let this guy sit on your lap!)
  • Guy with a small penis gets stripped naked
  • Necrophilia goes both ways (I'm not even sure what this means...)
  • A creature monster fuck me sex
  • Ass fucked in the cemetery with monster zombie
  • Barenaked headless babes (I was with you until headless)
  • Halloween or Friday the 13th episode shows girls lying under tree with big tits
  • Superman masturbating
  • Gay seduction of Aquaman (I'm considering getting tee-shirts printed with this phrase)

And, for the love of God, the person searching for Amazon sex/AmazonSex/Amazon sex toys/AmazonSexToys/Amazon sex dog video/Sex dog/dog sex/Sex dog 7/Sex with dog/dog sex tube and about FIFTY other variations, I assure you, you have the wrong webpage.  Please go away.

Far, far away.

--J/Metro

4 comments:

  1. It seems people really like searching for sex on the web. Who knew? I had some bizarre Christmas themed ones last month involving Santa that left me speechless. I keep meaning to do posts similar to this for my site, but keep forgetting.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Um, the answer to your last one is right over there in the right-hand column. Some post you did called "Odd Amazon: Sex Toys and Dog Beds." No wonder you're getting so much strange traffic to your site!

    ReplyDelete
  3. William: I'll be looking forward to seeing how people get to your site. The ironic thing is that posts like these cause a round robin effect. Someone got to my blog by searching for "Superman masturbating", so I make a post about it, and that post doubles the likelihood of an internet search for "Superman masturbating" pointing to my site, etc.

    Michele: Yeah, I'm sure that post brought some pretty strange visitors to my site. But after clicking on the link 50 times, you would have thought that they would learn that this is not, in fact, a bestiality site. Although that would, apparently, give me a lot more traffic.

    Thanks for stopping by!
    --J/Metro

    ReplyDelete
  4. The round robin effect is why I will forever have people looking for naked contortionists (often "naked contortionists in luggage")on my humble book blog.

    ReplyDelete

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