Monday, December 12, 2011

John Carpenter at Funny or Die!

So apparently back in October, John Carpenter hosted a number of "scary" videos over at Funny or Die in honor of Halloween. I know that I'm a few months late to the party, but I just discovered them and wanted to share. Besides, it's always my head.

Embedded below is the introductory video, but to watch the actual short films themselves, all you have to do is click on the title.


What Have You Done To Me?: A trailer for the fake sci-fi/horror hybrid I Was A Human Experiment which comes from another planet. It's got a chuckle or two nestled in its 92-second running time.

Scary Girl: Believe it or not, this video starts off with a brief clip of John Carpenter himself playing the Halloween theme on an organ, almost worth the price of admission alone.  We follow Scary Girl actress Enid through the ups-and-downs of her career, from appearing on television (iCarly), horror films, and even a Sunny Delight commercial.

Twilight - Breaking Dawn Spoof:  Not at all what you're expecting.  I had to watch this one a few times to be sure that my browser didn't screw up.  Sort of like a bizarre skit from the cancelled-too-early MTV series The State, with a cute little reference to Enter the Void that not everyone is going to catch.

Horror Masters - Cat Thrower:  You know all those fake scares in horror movies caused by felines jumping through the air at the characters onscreen?  That's the work of Clint Cornwall, Cat Thrower.  Features real-life examples from horror flicks, and a genius Friday the 13th Part V joke.

1:00 On Cedar Lane:  It's got a creative "villain" in it, but in truth it is neither scary nor funny.  Die, please.

Clumsy Ghost:  What if the ghost in Paranormal Activity wasn't really mean, just a bit of a klutz?  This could have been a clever video, but at a mere 36 seconds, it never gets a chance to find its footing.

Haunted Slide:  Slide aficionados be warned, that when you find a slide on a Native American Burial Playground, it can only lead you to one place.  And that place is Satan's butthole.  Dumb, pointless, and immature.

The Original Monster Mash: Did you know that the Monster Mash song we all know and love isn't the original version, but instead is a watered-down bastardization of Bobby Pickett's true artistic vision?  For the first time anywhere, see the original music video.  Crude, but oddly brilliant.  Warning: NSFW.  Not even a little bit.

Soblin the Finx: A trick-or-treater gets a surprise when he bumps into Soblin the Finx.  Although it's not funny, there is definitely a certain charm to it, and would have benefited from a longer running time.  I could easily see this concept being expanded into feature length and becoming an indie Halloween favorite.

Charlie Brown - Blockhead's Revenge: Ever wonder what the Peanuts kids would be like when they grew up?  Marcy and Peppermint Patty are hot lesbians; Lucy finally seduces Schroeder; and Charlie Brown?  He's a psychotic killer.  Cool and clever every step of the way, this short even manages to give us the Peanuts theme by way of Halloween.  Badassery is afoot.


  1. thanks for the solid post and links...
    hope all is s-well2.

  2. Thanks for posting this! I had never seen these!

  3. iZombie & Jen: Thanks for stopping by. Hope you two enjoyed the videos. Glad to see that I wasn't the only blogger that these slipped by without notice.



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