Evil Bong 3
The Wrath of Bong
Written by August White
Directed by Charles Band
Al McDowell...Peter Stickles
Larnell...John Patrick Jordan
A strange little bald man who has just murdered his wife discovers a meteorite that has fallen from the sky. The meteorite cracks open, and inside he finds a monstrous looking space bong, which he promptly takes to the local head shop and hocks it for a cool twenty bucks.
Meanwhile, nerdy Al McDowell from the Space Institute and his delusional, conspiracy theorist cohort Larnell arrive at the meteorite too late, and track the space bong to the head shop, which is coincidentally owned by their old friends Bachman and Brett.
The space bong is a chatty little fellow with plans of world domination, and anyone who smokes out of him is transported to Bong World, where they are seduced by red and green hotties collecting human sperm for...some reason.
In order to save the planet from the upcoming invasion, the boys have to call in Dr. Weed and Nurse Hookah, current owners of the notorious Evil Bong.
Silly doesn't even begin to describe it.
Some time back, Full Moon had sent me a preview disk with the first 20 minutes of this movie. My assessment from that initial exposure proved correct: pot humor gets old quickly when you're not high, and the closest I have gotten to smoking weed in the past dozen years is drooling over Mary-Louise Parker.
Overflowing with weed culture references and white boy weed rap, it's obvious that this series, perhaps more than any other Full Moon franchise, has a built-in audience.
If you have a collection of black light posters, this movie might be for you.
If you're wearing a Bob Marley tee-shirt right now, this movie might be for you.
If you consider Cheech & Chong your spiritual godfathers, this movie might be for you.
If you know the lyrics to a Kottonmouth Kings song, this movie might be for you.
If you have a cupboard full of cheese puffs and Pop Tarts, this movie might be for you.
If you have already forgotten what movie we're talking about...this movie is definitely for you.
It looks surprisingly good despite the cheesy talking bong FX, and the acting is better than in a lot of indie flicks. It's just too bad that it's so sophomoric and ridiculous. It probably would have been more enjoyable if some of the gimmickry translated to the home video market. I understand the 3D being left out of the equation, but the Sniff-O-Rama card would have been a nice inclusion.
Braindead, but mostly harmless.
"I think this thing stinks like a sumo wrestler's just taken a dump on a burning tire!"
(Pick up this flick from Full Moon Direct!)